“I want you to call your dad and apologize for being a dishonoring daughter,” the voice said. It had been decades since the time of life when Anita was at the height of her rebellion, when drugs and alcohol and other kinds of wild living put enormous strain on her relationship with her dad. But after all that time, maturity and life had set in, and she was now a middle-aged woman far removed from those rebel years. That’s why it seemed like an odd thing for God to want her to do. So much water had passed under the bridge.
But the relationship between Anita and her dad had never been fulfilling and God’s prompting seemed to be an opportunity to bring them closer. Anita was actually rather excited about it.
When she made the call, the apology came quickly and so did the tears, with both sides regretful for all the hurtful actions and things said and the following years of distance. “When you mentioned something about an apology,” Anita’s dad said, “I thought you were calling me so that I could apologize to you.”
“Apologize to me? About what?” Anita asked.
“For giving you the money for the abortion.”
The comment almost knocked her out of her chair. She had just recently, in the days prior, experienced a confusing vision of a kidney bean with a baby in it. With her dad’s comment, she broke down and cried and didn’t stop for several hours.
Since the day that she had an abortion when she was 19 years old, the emotional pain that showed up at the doorway of her soul was so fierce that she knew that in order to survive, she was going to have to fight back with everything she had—and everything she had was drugs, alcohol, and loose living. She waged war against the guilt that threatened her sanity by numbing her body and mind relentlessly. Year after year the battles were fought until she just simply forgot about it.
Suddenly, after her dad’s comment, it all came rushing back.
Their conversation proved that you can push a feeling so far down that it can actually fall from your mind. It was a remarkable discovery into the depths of her own soul. But was that it? Or was there more to the story?
The answer would come soon.
“I want you to post your story to Facebook,” the voice said again. The abortion had been a shameful event for Anita, which was part of the need to starve it of life. But suddenly, she felt a bit of excitement to follow God’s prompting and expose it—perhaps it would be used to do some good.
What followed was something that Anita never expected. Her Facebook post about her abortion has reached and set many sufferers free of the debilitating effects of abortion. Did God have use for a 40-year old wound? The answer is yes.
To read the post that God has used so mightily, click here.
If you are experiencing or have experienced post-abortion trauma and would like help or guidance, click here.